“The Former” is a song by Steinza that explores themes of unrequited love and self-respect. The lyrics delve into the complexities of a relationship where the narrator feels used and decides to break free from a toxic cycle. The song was released in 2023 and gained popularity on TikTok.
In this article, we’ll explore the message conveyed in the song’s lyrics.
Table of Contents
“The Former” Lyrics Meaning
Verse 1
If hurting me doesn′t hurt you
Then you don’t love me I′m just being used
Hold the gate, I’m coming through
I’m gon′ run far away from you
The opening verse addresses a one-sided relationship. The narrator realizes that their partner doesn’t genuinely care for them, as hurting the narrator doesn’t affect the partner. This leads to the realization that they’re being used. The last two lines express the narrator’s decision to leave this toxic situation.
Chorus
All on my own once again
We′re made to be lovers, not meant to be friends
I’m stuck on the former, you′re stuck on the fence
Drunk if you think that I’ll wait here again
The chorus reflects on the aftermath of the breakup. The narrator finds themselves alone again, emphasizing the cyclical nature of their relationship struggles. They express the belief that they were meant to be lovers, not just friends, highlighting the mismatch in their expectations. The phrase “stuck on the former” suggests the narrator is still emotionally invested, while their partner is indecisive (“stuck on the fence”). The last line firmly states that the narrator won’t wait around anymore.
Verse 2
Age won′t protect you from love
Darling, love will protect you from age
Up above, Jesus help us
Oh, to find every reason to stay
This verse takes a more philosophical turn. It suggests that age doesn’t protect one from the vulnerabilities of love, but love itself can be a shield against the ravages of time. The reference to Jesus implies a spiritual aspect, possibly seeking divine help to find reasons to stay in the relationship despite the difficulties.
Chorus
Far from alone once again
We’re made to be lovers, not meant to be friends
I′m stuck on the former and you’re stuck on the fence
Drunk if you think that I’ll wait here again
The repetition of the chorus reinforces the narrator’s emotional state and determination to move on.
Hook & Outro
Again
Oh, again
Yes, again
Again (oh, again and again and again, again)
Again (oh, again)
Again (and again)
Again (again)
The repeated “Again” emphasizes the cyclical nature of these relationship patterns. It could be interpreted as the narrator’s realization that they’ve been in this situation before and might find themselves here again in the future, despite their best intentions to break free.
Deeper Meaning Behind “The Former”
“The Former” by Steinza is a song that likely delves into themes of past relationships, personal growth, and moving on. While the specific lyrics are not provided in the search results, we can infer some potential meanings based on the context and the artist’s other works.
The title “The Former” suggests a focus on something or someone from the past, possibly an ex-partner or a former version of oneself. This implies a narrative of change and transformation, where the singer reflects on what once was and how it has shaped their present. The song may explore the emotional journey of leaving behind a significant part of one’s life and the process of accepting that change.
Steinza’s music often touches on deep, introspective themes, as evidenced by the titles of their other songs like “Visions Of You” and “I Know You”. “The Former” likely continues this trend, offering a poignant examination of personal experiences and the complexities of human relationships. The song might address the bittersweet nature of memories, the pain of letting go, and the strength required to embrace a new chapter in life.
Given the song’s popularity on platforms like TikTok, it’s possible that “The Former” resonates with listeners who are going through similar experiences of loss, change, or self-discovery. The track may provide a cathartic outlet for those processing the end of a relationship or coming to terms with past versions of themselves, offering comfort through shared experiences and emotional vulnerability.

Jacob Carter is a lyricist. He created the lyrics writing course to teach people how to analyze and write lyrics. He graduated from the University of Oxford with a degree in English Literature, so he’s skilled at playing with words.
He’s also an amateur guitarist, which means he knows music and melody very well. With this background, he’s a great lyricist you can rely on to learn writing lyrics.