“Because of You” is a song by Kelly Clarkson, a popular American pop singer. It’s from her second album, Breakaway, which came out in 2004. She worked on it with David Hodges and Ben Moody, who were in the band Evanescence. The song was released on August 16, 2005, as the third single from Breakaway.
Clarkson wrote “Because of You” when she was 16, as a way to cope with the tough emotions she felt about her parents getting divorced. In the song, Clarkson likely talks about her difficult relationship with her father.
This article will look at what the lyrics of the song mean.
“Because of You” Lyrics Meaning
[Verse 1]
I will not make the same mistakes that you did
I will not let myself cause my heart so much misery
I will not break the way you did, you fell so hard
I’ve learned the hard way to never let it get that far
In Verse 1, Kelly Clarkson expresses her determination not to repeat the mistakes made by her parents, singing, “I will not make the same mistakes that you did.”
She’s determined not to let her heart be filled with the same pain and sadness that her parents experienced, as expressed in the line “I will not let myself cause my heart so much misery.”
Clarkson observes how her parents’ relationship fell apart and caused them significant pain, as evident in the line “I will not break the way you did, you fell so hard.”
In the line “I’ve learned the hard way to never let it get that far,” she implies that she’s learned from her parents’ experience and doesn’t want to let her own relationships deteriorate to the same extent.
[Chorus]
Because of you
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side so I don’t get hurt
Because of you
I find it hard to trust not only me, but everyone around me
Because of you, I am afraid
In the chorus, the phrase “Because of you” suggests that her current feelings and actions are a direct result of her past experiences and interactions with her father.
The line “I never stray too far from the sidewalk” symbolizes Clarkson’s reluctance to take risks or step outside her comfort zone. The “sidewalk” represents safety and familiarity, while “straying too far” suggests venturing into unknown or potentially risky territory. She metaphorically stays close to safety, avoiding situations that might lead to pain or disappointment.
Clarkson reveals that she’s developed a cautious approach to life as a result of her past experiences. She’s learned to protect herself emotionally by avoiding situations that could potentially lead to pain or vulnerability. She sings, “I learned to play on the safe side so I don’t get hurt.”
Clarkson admits to struggling with trust issues as a result of her past experiences, as she sings, “I find it hard to trust not only me, but everyone around me.” This lack of trust may stem from feeling let down or betrayed in the past, particularly by her father.
Her fear is directly attributed to the influence of her father, suggesting that his actions have instilled a sense of apprehension within her. She sings, “Because of you, I am afraid.”
[Verse 2]
I lose my way
And it’s not too long before you point it out
I cannot cry
Because I know that’s weakness in your eyes
I’m forced to fake a smile, a laugh, every day of my life
My heart can’t possibly break
When it wasn’t even whole to start with
In Verse 2, Clarkson admits to feeling directionless or lost in her life. The line “I lose my way” could suggest a lack of clarity or purpose, possibly stemming from the emotional turmoil caused by her father’s actions or their relationship.
She expresses how her father often criticizes her mistakes, as seen in the line “And it’s not too long before you point it out.” This line implies a pattern of negative reinforcement or a lack of support from her father when she struggles.
Clarkson reveals that she feels unable to express her emotions freely, particularly sadness, singing, “I cannot cry.” She explains the reason behind her reluctance to cry—it’s perceived as a weakness by her father, as evident in the line “Because I know that’s weakness in your eyes.”
Clarkson describes the facade she feels compelled to maintain in her daily life, singing, “I’m forced to fake a smile, a laugh, every day of my life.”
Despite her internal struggles and emotional pain, she feels pressured to present a happy or composed exterior, likely to avoid further criticism or disappointment from her father, as she sings, “I’m forced to fake a smile, a laugh, every day of my life.”
In the line “My heart can’t possibly break when it wasn’t even whole to start with,” Clarkson suggests that her heart was never whole or complete, possibly due to the lack of emotional support or validation from her father.
[Bridge]
I watched you die, I heard you cry every night in your sleep
(I watched you die, in your sleep)
I was so young, you should have known better than to lean on me
(I was too young for you to lean on me)
You never thought of anyone else, you just saw your pain
(You never saw me, yeah, yeah)
And now I cry in the middle of the night
For the same damn thing
In the Bridge, Clarkson describes witnessing her father’s emotional struggles and pain. She sings, “I watched you die, I heard you cry every night in your sleep (I watched you die, in your sleep).” The imagery of her father “dying” suggests a metaphorical death of his spirit or happiness, possibly due to his own emotional turmoil or the breakdown of their family. The mention of him crying every night in his sleep conveys the depth of his emotional distress, which she was privy to as a witness.
In the line “I was so young, you should have known better than to lean on me (I was too young for you to lean on me),” she reflects on the burden placed on her as a young child or adolescent. The phrase “you should have known better” suggests a failure on her father’s part to protect her from his emotional struggles. Clarkson expresses a sense of unfairness or imbalance in their relationship, emphasizing that she was too young to bear the weight of her father’s emotional needs.
Clarkson laments the lack of recognition or acknowledgment of her own emotional well-being and presence by her father. She confronts her father’s self-centeredness and emotional preoccupation, singing, “You never thought of anyone else, you just saw your pain (You never saw me, yeah, yeah).”
Despite her efforts to cope or move past her childhood experiences, she finds herself experiencing the same emotional pain and turmoil as her father. She reveals the lasting impact of her father’s emotional neglect or focus on his own pain, singing, “And now I cry in the middle of the night for the same damn thing.”
[Chorus 2]
Because of you
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side so I don’t get hurt
Because of you
I try my hardest just to forget everything
Because of you
I don’t know how to let anyone else in
Because of you
I’m ashamed of my life because it’s empty
Because of you
I am afraid
In Chorus 2, Clarkson reaffirms that her behavior is influenced by her father’s actions or their relationship. She maintains her cautious approach to life, avoiding risks or venturing into unknown territory. She attributes her cautiousness to the fear of experiencing the same hurt she endured in the past.
In the line “Because of you, I try my hardest just to forget everything,” Clarkson reveals her efforts to cope with her past experiences by attempting to forget or suppress them. Despite her attempts to move on, the influence of her past remains deeply ingrained in her thoughts and actions.
Clarkson’s fear of vulnerability and potential hurt, stemming from her experiences with her father, has made it difficult for her to open up to others. She admits to struggling with intimacy and trust in her relationships, singing, “Because of you, I don’t know how to let anyone else in.”
Clarkson attributes these feelings to her father’s influence, suggesting that his actions or absence have contributed to her sense of inadequacy or dissatisfaction. She expresses feelings of shame and emptiness in her life, singing, “Because of you, I’m ashamed of my life because it’s empty.”
Music Video
In the video for “Because of You,” we see Kelly Clarkson and her husband arguing intensely at home. He threatens to destroy a family picture, but then time freezes, leaving only him motionless while Clarkson remains unaffected.
She sees her younger self in the house, and they walk together through painful memories of her childhood. These memories include her father rejecting a picture she made for him and her mother preparing dinner, only for her father to throw it away during a stormy evening.
Clarkson’s mother is driven to despair, seen taking pills and shutting the door on her crying younger self during a particularly distressing moment. The breaking point arrives when her parents have a physical altercation and her father leaves despite her younger self’s pleas.
Returning to the present, Clarkson and her husband reconcile instead of fighting. They realize their daughter witnessed their argument in the video and embrace her and each other.
Throughout the video, Clarkson sings on the porch, her mother’s bed, and in a room surrounded by mirrors, reflecting her younger self’s image.
Deeper Meaning Behind “Because of You”
Kelly Clarkson wrote “Because of You” when she was just 16, reflecting on her parents’ divorce. In the lyrics, she vows not to repeat her parents’ mistakes and expresses fear of love due to the pain caused by the divorce.
Despite eventually marrying Brandon Blackstock in 2013, Clarkson faced a painful divorce seven years later, echoing the fears expressed in the song.
Clarkson started writing the song before her American Idol win, inspired by a conversation with friends about the influence of older peers. She sent a demo tape to producers David Hodges and Ben Moody, who collaborated with her on the song.
In the song, Clarkson opens up about her parents’ divorce and how her dad’s emotional absence has left a mark on her. She reveals how her past haunts her, making it hard for her to fully connect with others and leaving her feeling empty. She expresses, “Because of you, I’m ashamed of my life because it’s empty.”
However, she is determined not to repeat the same mistakes her parents made. She sings, “I will not make the same mistakes that you did,” showing her commitment to break free from the dysfunction of her upbringing and learn from it.
Overall, this song is a personal revelation where the singer opens up about her emotional scars and her battle to break the cycle of her parents’ mistakes.
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